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Satire

It’s April

The sun starts to shine and the first of the month always hits hard

Satire 10 months ago

Every year in April, Eugene Weekly staff takes a look at spring, the May primary election and what’s going on in the world. Sometimes we … Continue reading →

April 1 News briefs

Satire 10 months ago

CAMPUS NEWS  UO on Drugs and Alcohol The school seeks to raise awareness among faculty about drinking on campus By Bentley Freeman Recent news stories … Continue reading →

Oregon Criminalizes Everything

Gov. Tina Kotek signs a bill into law that criminalizes everything in Oregon; freed up funds may be given to law enforcement.

Satire 10 months ago

After House Bill 4002, a bill that recriminalized the possession of small amounts of illicit substances, passed in the Senate on March 1, Oregon lawmakers … Continue reading →

From Frog to Woke Eugene in Letters 

Satire 10 months ago

FROG FOR MAYOR I recently attended the City Club of Eugene meeting featuring the current mayoral candidates. They were interesting, but none of them has … Continue reading →

Eugene Hops on the e-Train

A revolutionary revision to the city’s transportation plan will put us on the map, officials say

Satire 10 months ago

Despite fierce criticism from downtown drivers whose commutes have been disrupted by the city’s downtown bike-lane project, city planners have expanded the municipal transportation program … Continue reading →

Trumpstone

Donald Trump moves to Eugene, where he bought the Crapstone complex and plans to take over the University of Oregon Athletic Department

Satire 10 months ago

Faced with hundreds of millions of dollars in civil penalties and the collapse of his real estate empire, former president Donald Trump is moving his … Continue reading →

5th Street Castle

Eugene City Council crowns Brian Obie, king of the 5th

Satire 2 years ago

Phil Knight might have built a moat around the Jaqua Center and planted a forest around Autzen Stadium, but it’s former Eugene Mayor Brian Obie … Continue reading →

A School Board Odyssey  

Tired of a dysfunctional 4J school board, students program a chatbot to take over 

Satire 2 years ago

As the squabbling Eugene School District 4J Board of Directors continues to make local and state headlines, K-12 students have ousted its members and installed … Continue reading →

City Hauled

The ongoing question of Eugene’s City Hall is resolved

Satire 2 years ago

Eugene’s City Hall is once again in question. Citizens and city councilors alike thought the issue was settled once the agreement was made to purchase … Continue reading →

You Spin Me Right Round

Area environmentalist lost on roundabout

Satire 2 years ago

Following yearslong campaigning for the cities of Springfield and Eugene to add more roundabouts to major thoroughfares, a local environmentalist has now become a major … Continue reading →

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